Why staying up late is bad: Reason #437

I have had a real issue with getting to bed at a decent time each night. I can’t really explain why I do it but I cannot get myself to go to bed when I should. I’ve got a stack of books to read, blogs to look at, shows to watch and I find it’s easiest to do these things when everyone is sleeping. Less guilt and zero interruptions. I also find waking up to be physically painful so somewhere among the cobwebs of my brain, it makes sense to just not sleep…

The other night on my second attempt to fall asleep, I was laying in bed listening to the Man of My Dreams sleep when I started thinking about my chickens. We will be introducing the younger ones to the older ones soon and I was wondering how that would go. I then thought, how do chickens find out about laying eggs? Is it instinctual or do they need to be taught by the older, wiser hens what to expect? What if one day they just have a stomach ache and they don’t know why but they really want to eat a whole pan of brownies. Who helps them through this life changing rite of passage?

I then had a vision of Gabriella and Chicken sitting on their roost with 4 young hens sitting around them waiting for ‘The Talk’. This is how it went:

G&C: Bok bok bok bok bok ba-bok bok bok.

4 Young chickens fidget uncomfortably, not making eye contact with anyone.

G&C: Bok bok bok bok (squats) BAAAGOK bok bok bok.

4YC(stunned and slightly queasy): BOK. BOK. BOK.

G&C: Bok.

None of the chickens make eye contact for days and the young chickens don’t sleep for weeks…waiting for that dreadful day…

Moral of the story? Invest in Ambien.

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