Where did I leave my dignity?

I don’t always think I’m old but there are times where I realize I am not so young either. I realize the 30s are where life really begins-you’ve mostly let go of the insecurities of the teens and 20s. Usually you’ve accepted who you are as a person and you are in the thick of your career or raising children or both.

The times I feel most ‘past my prime’ (besides the times I yell at people for driving too fast on my street, or the phrase ‘crazy teenagers’ come out of my mouth or the realization that leg warmers are back…um why??) is when I try to go out on the town. I don’t feel it so strongly if I’m hitting the movies or going to dinner at my usual spots, but when I go to out to do something ‘out of the box’, well, that’s a different story.

I found out that my film professor was doing some stand up comedy at a comedy club downtown. My husband couldn’t go so I asked some girlfriends if they would want to go and Amy and I were the only ones that could go so she was going to meet me down at the club. I was going to drive downtown on. my. own. Not only was I heading there alone, at night in the snow, I couldn’t remember the best way to get to the club, so I had to ask my GPS aka my husband the best route there. Now, I used to take great pride in my ability to get myself around, I still do, but when everywhere you go is within a 10 mile radius for the past 9 years, it tends to shake the directional confidence.

It was almost time to go and I wanted to change my shirt into something nicer, plus, it smelled like cooked meat (I know, I am wicked hot!). I grabbed my best sweater, which in my closet that just means it still has it’s shape, it fits me and it’s not covered in a bunch of little nubbins….oh and it doesn’t smell like meat… I throw it on and go to check myself in the mirror and I notice I had spilled something on it. Yup, it was Metamucil from the night before. At this point, most of you would probably remove the sweater, find another fashionable top to wear and go with it (of course most of you probably don’t even know what Metamucil is, so why would you have it on your shirt in the first place?!). Oh, no. Not me. I got a washcloth and rubbed the dickens out of that mess until it looked like there had almost been no stain at all.

I then made my way downtown and attempted to find a quick parking space, which don’t exist, and ended up parking underneath the mall (WiseGuys is right next to Trolley Square Mall, so it makes sense…). The moment I exited my car, I was not only worried about getting mugged, but that I would forget where my car is, but I made my way to club hoping for the best. As I was making my way there, Amy had texted me saying that she was inside and saving seats “Right on the front row, just for you!”

Super. Not only do I sit on the front row in class because I am ‘one of those students’ (yeah, I even ask questions and make comments…sigh..) I am now on the front row of his comedy show, reaffirming the obvious fact that I may be a Teacher’s Pet.

After I wandered the mall in a stupor, being incredibly lost and turned around, I finally found the club, found Amy (who wasn’t right on the front row, phew!), got my virgin Diet Coke and Rum and I was ready for comedy! As long as it wasn’t dirty and didn’t go past my bedtime. I had to hit Walmart before my curfew!

Needless to say, it was a fun night full of laughs and it’s something I want to do again! I haven’t been out like that in years, obviously!

Next time, I’ll be sure to forego the meat perfume and Metamucil accessories.