“Water for sale!” A story of young and innocent swindling.

Hey! Look at me! I’m posting again! Wow!

As I mentioned before, my husband was out of town all week last week, my children are home and omnipresent and I am just trying to keep it together. And shower at least once or twice. So when my kids said, “We want to have a water stand!” I said, “Umm…okay…good luck with that. Here’s water and cups.” Yeah, I didn’t even put ice in it. All I was thinking is that’ll keep them busy for 20 minutes, they’ll get bored and come back in.

Two hours later, they come in sunburned and rich. They made $3 and I caught up on Kate and her hair…I mean kids… All I know is, my house was blissfully quiet while I watched them through the window and my 2 year old napped.

I was a happy camper.

Shortly after, I started hearing from my scammed and disgruntled neighbors on Facebook.

From Cassie:

“So I thought your cute daughter was selling some Kool Aid.....I find out too late, that its water (Side note: there was a sign saying “WATER FOR SALE”)! What the what?! 50 cents for water (Side note: that’s right! Best freaking tap water this side of the tracks!!)?! Alexis said I could have my $$$ back, and Audrey was like NOOO (Side note: Hey, a couple guys paid them a buck just for pure cuteness! You got a deal!) ! ha ha ha seriously! Give the poor girl a Kool Aid packet! :) Its all good, I told them they could keep the 50 cents but next time its FREE! ha ha ha
I wanted to be a brat & throw something at your window, but I didn't, I saw you sitting on your couch, watching Kate plus 8 (Side note: I prefer to call it ‘research’, I mean it is on THE LEARNING CHANNEL!). I was walking & told Hunter that he could get some KoolAid from the stand. He was so excited! :P
So when we got the water, I told Hunter he could just dump it out. He said that he would dump it out at our house, he did not want them to see him pouring it out!!
I was able to save the day with a popsicle!! You owe me big time!!
HA HA HA HA HA HA HA”

From Melanie:

“I wonder what happened to the good ol' days when kids sold lemonade for 25 cents. Today...all I got was a cup of water. lol....Thanks Audrey, it was the best tap water I have ever had. (Side note: See?? Told ya!!)… Mindi, she can keep the quarter(Side note: I offered to pay her back). However, I was offered water for 25 cents or a dollar. I wonder what I would have received had a paid the dollar (Side note: the same amount). I thought it was hilarious.”

So, next time you are in my neighborhood, have your cash ready and just look for the cute girls selling lukewarm cool, possibly floaty ridden clear, tap mountain spring water in used clean, fresh cups!

Why would I pay for a Koolaid packet or clean cups?? That’s just pure overhead!

The post with no title.

Oh boy.

Summer is here. I have had ideas to write about but by the time I can sit down and put my thoughts together they come out like this: bahbahbahbahbahbahbahbahbahbah……

……bahbahbahbahbah……

…………bah…..

I’m not entirely sure what day it is.

Crap. I just caught myself watching Kipper the dog.

Anyway, we’ve had some miracles worth mentioning:

We survived our first camping trip of the season. I’m determined to be a camping family, even if it kills us! While the was a little rain and and an episode of vomiting, the trip went quite swimmingly. There was little to  no sleep for this lass but that would be asking waaay too much! All I know is, camping with all girls makes for a looong night filled with mini bladders. I am so getting some sort of port-a-potty!

There were s’mores:

     

 

Friends…

 

Little bit of rain…

Craziness..

And pure unadulterated joy…

 

My favorite part? There was no drama. Just fun. Did I mention there was s’mores?

And this is what happens the afternoon after a camping trip:

Another major miracle that has no explanation is I decided to make lists for my 2 older girls of things they had to do before they can do anything fun. The weird thing about it is they are actually doing it with minimal fighting!! My kids have been done with their stuff by 9 AM quite often! I also made a list of house rules. You know what? People aren’t climbing on tables and counters anymore! They are actually asking for food rather than taking whatever they want….weird. My jaw is still dragging on the ground and I am determined to keep it up, even if it kills me!

Lastly, my husband had to go to a week of girl’s camp for our church and he took our van. I didn’t think I would survive, I honestly do not know how single parents do it! Somehow we made it through and no one died. One of my BFF’s even offered to take the kids overnight so  I could go up to the camp and surprise my man. Of course, I chose the one night that was below freezing and raining but it was better than having kids climbing all over me all day long. At least for a little while. My husband and I were actually able to have *gasp* several conversations without interruption! Seriously, the next thing you know someone will be walking on water or something!

And I forgot one more-Actually finishing this post! Did I tell you I started this a week ago?? I’m beginning to wonder if my blog season is over. I hope not but we’ll see.

Ten Things to Smile About

 

My blogger BFF Emmy does this thing every month where she lists the top 10 things from her month and I keep wanting to join her but keep failing. I figure I’ve been so downright suicidal Captain Grumpypants for the past year couple months I ought to do it, you know, turn over a new leaf or something like that.

1. My gradumacation from the community college!

2. With my family cheering me on.

 

3. Getting a laptop-which I really can take anywhere, trust me, I’ve tried!

4. My baby’s first piano recital where she totally nailed her music!

5. Brownies and licking the spoon….hhhmmmmm

6. Pony rides.

7.FORTS!!!!

8. Learning to ride a bike without training wheels!

   

9. Being married to this guy:

10. Being pitied cool enough to earn a few awards!

Laura from PurseBlogger gave me this one. She’s so fun and I can’t believe she thought of me for this award! She really is a delight! Go check her out.  So many people light up my life but here’s only a few:

I have 3 SIL’s that blog and they are great to read! I swear this isn’t just nepotism-they really are rays of sunshine!

Heather where she talks about her cute son who has autism.

Jana, she is always inspirational and looking for the positive in life.

Ruth, I just love to read about her family since they live so far away! It’s like being right there!

Gae, who is a pure delight in everyway and happens to be my brother’s mother-in-law!

And of course there’s the twins of no relation (to me or each other) but they brighten my day:

Krista and Cassie, they both share funny and sweet stories about their kids, plus, they still like me even though I tend to break things or almost burn things down…

This one I got from my IRL-BFF Glamazon. I am so lucky to know her, seriously! She’s even awesomer live! Trust me!

This one I am giving to:

My awesome friend, Rachel, I am sure one day I will be swearing up and down that I knew her way back before she was a famous author!

To Tristan who is always exercising her writing muscles with days with her kids to living with diabetes.

Stacy, she picked up her family and moved ‘Down Under’ for a few years, keeping us all updated, and has now come back to to the States and started a new blog but with the same great writing and photography!

And lastly, to April who has a 4 year old boy and 2 year old twins and has lived to tell the tale AND make you laugh while at it!

Tylaine over at Just Me gave me this award which is really only appropriate late into a girl’s night when you’ve had waaay too much junk food and you are loopy with a sugar coma and lack of kids. So I’m aaalll over it! teehee I think I list 5 celebrities I would give up my virtue to. Of course, the only man that gets that is my lucky husband but we can pretend, right??

1. Robert Downey Jr. has always made me swoon a little but he’s only gotten better with age!

2. Owen Wilson just makes me giggle with glee! Every time I see him I want to lounge around on the beach with him and a nice cool drink!

 

3. This goes without saying but Bob Harper could work me out any time!

4. Gerard Butler had me at “Music of the Night”!

5. Johnny Depp. I don’t know what it is but he can even make a gross pirate look sexy!

Man, that was hard but get me going and I could have a ginormous list! So now I pass this prestigious award to:

Amy R.

Rikke

Wym

Jillian

Lolee

I hope you’ve all had a fantastic Memorial Weekend and a big thanks to all those serving our country and their families!!

Confessional

It’s confessional Friday and since this is a rare treat to hang, sort of, with my BFF, Glamazon, I just have to participate. Man, I miss that lady and her dance moves-if you get too close, though, you might get wacked with her ‘huge tracks of land’, and trust me, it’s like a sandbag to the face! ;)

I confess~

• Right now I have “Yakkity Yak, Don’t Talk Back” stuck in my head.
• But not just any normal version of the song, I have Governor Ahnold singing it, you know, back when he sang it in his hit movie “Twins”?
• It’s really hard to master a fake Austrian accent and sing at the same time.
• I am a flat iron addict and I have been ‘sober’ for 14 days.
• I miss my hot baby.
• My hair is probably happier, even if it is poofier..
• Most people get their hair done every 6 weeks or so.
• I get mine done every 6 months.
• I’ve got my semi annual appointment next month
• And boy, does Carlee have her work cut out for her! Sharpen those scissors, lady!
• “Cut out”?? Get it Baahahahahhaha
• I think I need to get out of the house more…
• Yesterday I broke my urine sample cup during midstream at the doctor’s.
• You’re probably wondering, wow, she has a Herculean pee stream!
• Nope. I was apparently holding on to the cup with a little more effort than was necessary.
• And it buckled on my Herculean thumb and pointy finger.
• So I was sitting there with a leaky cup, still going, laughing my head off with my pants around my ankles.
• I’m sure everyone outside was wondering what I was doing in there.
• Maybe that’s why they were staring at me when I came out.
• That explains the mental evaluation….at the gynecologist… 

The miraculous slip cover

When ElRey and I were first married, we didn’t plan on buying any furniture because we had no money. But one day we happened to be visiting RC Willey and saw this great living room set(which, by the way, every other young couple within a 20 mile radius apparently bought, too) for relatively cheap and since RC Willey hands out credit to any old dumbass, we ended up with a nice set of couches, end tables, lamps and a coffee table and a lovely monthly payment.

Things started disappearing from our little set through the years. First, it was the coffee table that had a cracked leg and we feared a head injury being inflicted on the smallest of family members. Then a lamp moved into the bedroom. To save space, we moved an end table out of our front room. Suddenly our living room set became just the couches and end table with lamp.

For our children these couches have been a trampoline, table, napkin, art pad, and toilet. We’ve tried cleaning them with a carpet cleaner, spot cleaning and we’ve even thrown the upholstery in the washer! Yeah, they shrank. As much as we’d love to renew our monthly payments at good ole RC Willey, we decided to resort to the next best thing. Slip covers.

*Note, I am sure there will be at least 3 comments of people saying they have these same couches just from this small peek,

With the slip covers we suddenly had brand new couches. And, they’re washable and shrinkable!  They saved us from humiliation of water stains and funky smells. They renewed our living room and our love for one another. Okay, so it didn’t go quite that far, but we were no longer embarrassed of our living room.

The problem is that now I think there should be a slip cover for everything. Something you just drape over whatever may be unseemly and make it new again. That way magic would happen. Allow me to demonstrate.

<---This becomes this---->

 

<---This becomes this--->

 

<---This becomes this--->

 

 

<------This becomes this---->

Now, for those slip covers, I’d make a special trip to Bed, Bath and Beyond. I’d even buy ‘em on credit!

My kids can build a computer

Note the pink ‘mouse’ aka MP3 player.

Watch out Steve Jobs and Bill Gates.

What can your kid do?