The late night sticky notes

Why am I always a day late and a dollar short? Oh yeah, I wouldn’t be Mindi if I wasn’t.  I am so glad that Halloween is over! I love to have a reason to have a party but 4 days straight of celebrating the strangest holiday is a bit much for me.

On Sunday I watched the NYC marathon while eating Halloween candy. I was trying to give the runners energy through the TV. While we all felt like vomiting, I am sure it was for different reasons.

I woke up Monday morning with a Halloween hangover. I thought I was going to die. So I went for a 6 mile run. One of the best runs I’ve had in a long time. Weird. I went this morning with my friends and it totally kicked my trash. Even weirder.

I was in the shower this morning and Annie came running in to wash her hands. I asked, “What are you doing?”

She said, “Washing my hands.”

I asked, “Why?”

“Because “Hip Hop Harry” is on!” She said as though it was so obvious.

“uuummmkay….”

“Hip Hop Harry said I should always wash my hands because it gets rid of germs!”

“Annie, why is it when I tell you that you ignore me but if this Hip Hop Harry freak says to you run in here and do it?”

With her “I’m so damn cute” smile of hers she said, “Oh, just be quiet, mom!”

See? What’s so wrong about TV?!! It’s apparently doing a better job teaching my kids than I am!

And since it’s Tuesday we will now have Post Its Note night, hosted by SupahMommy!

 

 

 

 

Just one of the many classic jokes I have been enjoying around my house!

Goodnight and Big Balls.

Family Sunday Dinner

In an attempt to be connected with my ever growing independent kids, I try to ask them about what they learned at school, what was great about their day or what their plans are for destroying me in a slow ignominious death.

Tonight we sat down to potato soup in pumpkin bread bowls. I was hoping to balance out the sugar high with some salt and maybe add some swollen ankles to the stomach ache and spinning room.

Totally beside the point.

Anyway, I asked the girls what they learned about in church. I always know what Annie learned in church since I am involved-every week it’s the same-“how do I make my mom so crazy that by the time we make it home she just stares at the wall and says ‘ba ba ba ba ba’ until someone hands her a Diet Coke and a cookie?” Of cousre, what she actually says is, “JESUS” but we all know what it really means.

Audrey said, “Swearing.”

To which I replied, “swearing, really?”

Audrey: “Well, to not swear, it’s bad, you know like swear words.”

Mom: “Oh yeah, you shouldn’t swear.” (The lesson was on Choose The Right, so I’m guessing that was a major topic.)

Annie: “Yeah, like dammit. you shouldn’t say damn. Unless you are talking about a beaver’s dam.”

Man, cheesy potato soup really hurts coming out your nose!

The Big Topic

I know there are much more important things to be talking about tonight like the evilness of Halloween, what you are going to dress up as:half naked mermaid or naughty cop, the Energy crisis, economic crisis or any other crisis.

But where is the fun in that??

I am going to talk about Biggest Loser. Why do I love thee so much?? Is it Bob yelling at the ladies and then sitting in their laps and crying with them? Is it the drama of who said what and who’s playing the game? Or is it just plain motivating and fun to watch people drop the lbs right before my very eyes? 13 lbs in 2 hours? Freak! I can do that!

I totally watch it with a grain of salt. I realize it is a ‘reality’ show and most of it isn’t really reality. I wish they would focus more on how they all adjust to the changes. I mean they all say they were eating 1000’s of calories and not exercising at all and all of the sudden they are having around 1600 calories and exercising all day and there isn’t any mention of cravings or soreness from all this! They have got to be dying from that drastic of a change! I am also pretty sure a lot of stuff is rigged. Especially a couple of weeks ago when Tracy won control of the game AGAIN and then she wasn’t voted off even though everyone was saying she was gone. I am pretty sure there were some sneaky producers involved there!

It is highly motivating, though. I find myself saying to myself, if these guys who have never worked out before can go to the gym 5-6 hours a day, I can do 10 more minutes on the treadmill or I can add 5 more lbs to my weights.

Plus, Bob is pretty. Not as pretty as my hubby, but close.

You know what I love best about it? I love the ads! I mean 30 minutes of commercials to forward through isn’t enough! I am so glad they have started putting it in the show, too! I walk away wishing I had a stick of Extra SugarFree Gum or a Brita Filter. And I always have a hankerin’ for some Jennie O Turkey after. In a Ziploc bag.(You can purchase these fine products at your nearest WalMart, always low prices, always…) I mean do they think I’m stupid and I won’t notice the blatant ad?? (Milk, it does a body good!)

I don’t watch other reality shows, this is about as much drama as I can handle but I can just imagine the ads they would do in Survivor. “When I am not searching for a rat to stew or some grubs to swallow whole, I always love me some Jenni O Turkey!” “Since all I have to brush my teeth with is my grimy finger and some sand, I always chew Extra SugarFree Gum! It’s almost like eating real food!” Or my last one, “Whenever I take a drink from that stagnate pool of water, it reminds me of my Brita water filter back home. And when I didn’t have constant diarrhea!”

I don’t know if they have tried any of my ideas, but I think they are golden!

I guess the whole point is to get their product known by the masses. And that they do, even if it makes me want to kick someone in the crotch!

I gotta go. My juicy Jenni O Turkey is perfectly cooked in it’s Ziploc bag. I may even have me a stick of Extra gum for dessert!

What’s one of your favorite shows?

It’s Tuesday.

Annie came home from school the other day with this:

Very cute. She came up to dad to show him and said “Dad, look at my pumpkin… wait, where did my triangle nose go? And there was glue all over here and on the eyes…oh well…”

We praised her in her Jack O’ Lantern creation abilities. The perfect Jack. We put it with her school stuff and didn’t think about it again.

A few days later she came home with this….

“Mom, dad! This is my pumpkin! I picked up someone else’s by mistake. See? Here’s my triangle nose!”

Now that’s more like my Annie.

It’s quite artistic, really. She has eyelashes, and rosy cheeks. She may even be the next Picasso!

Now for (drum roll….) Post Its Tuesday!

CLICK NOTE TO FIND OUT HOW TO DO THEM

Do you guys like when I do these? I think it’s kinda fun but I didn’t know if you enjoyed it as much as I do. Let me know. I might or might not care. teehee You should check out Chief’s and SupahMommy. They always have great ones!

  

 

You don’t need to take back my library books, I survived…barely…

As you can see, I survived my math mid-term (what?? She had a math mid-term?? She never even mentioned she was in school…..she’s really pale…Hot Pocket…)

Sorry, random Gaffigan moment.

Anyhoo…..I am on the other side. I don’t know what my grade is but I finished the 23 question just shy of 2 hours…yeah, I’m pathetic.

Seeings how I didn’t think Enrichment Homemaking What is it Called? Relief Society Night, a midterm, a 3 hour night class and a pile of homework up to my fine booty was enough, I decided to host Book Club tonight.

What the what??? Now I gotta clean my giant postage stamp of a house for company to come over???? Holy Good Crap!! Do you think my guest will mind the streaks of I don’t even know what on my walls or the 4 inches of dust on everything (including my uterus), 2 broken chairs and the floor to sit on and a tasty refreshment we like to call ‘buttered saltines’?

I may have big shoes to fill tonight considering the last few houses we’ve met at don’t have the bewitching scent of “What the H is that???”, they had enough chairs for all their guests, no diapers hiding under there (haha, you said underwear!!) and they each have had a ‘snack’ spread you wouldn’t believe! I mean, homemade chocolate cupcakes of sin and butter, fruit salad fit for the Gods, delightful dips with homemade cinnamon chips, salsas, chocolate covered strawberries, Matthew McConaughey on toast….wait…..that was a different get together all together…..ahem…

But you know what??? I think they are gonna love it!

You know why? I’ll tell you why. I will do ANYTHING to entertain you. That’s right, I will be your performing monkey! If you leave my house without laughing either at my own pain and humiliation, the perfect line, or seeing what I can light on fire that you never thought you could, unless, of course, you were a 12 year old boy, then it is not my fault! I may not be the hostess-with-the-mostest but I can at least make you tear up and maybe even pee a little-mostly at my own expense.

So, even though it’s ‘just at Mindi’s house’ I know they will come. Who knows, I may even bring out the hummus WITH the buttered saltines!

You wanna come? We might even talk about the book! What were we reading again??

Post It Note Tuesday…

It’s Tuesday and I have already been very busy-telling people something I wasn’t supposed to, screaming at my kids, spent more money than I have and failed a math test. Awesome.

So, to celebrate I thought I would do some more Post-its to kind of clear my head of some random thoughts. I think these are brilliant and always love Chief’s (I pretty much think she’s as awesome as a cold Diet Coke on a very hot day!!) Post-it thoughts so I’m thinking I am officially on the SupahMommy (Who has like a billion awesome ideas!) bandwagon o’ fun. These can get addicting!

 

Click on the Post It Note to find out how to do your own!

 

 

    

What’s on your mind on this rainy Tuesday?

PS-If you don’t hear from me in a while, the math mid-term fried my brain and I am now in the Funny Farm. Just know I love you all….